I'm 9 hours and 54 minutes into the new year and everything is still the same... people pretend...no lie to themselves that as soon as the clock strikes midnight, and the calendar turns to January 1, everything changes... the only thing that changes is that we get 1 day older and perhaps realize that you are a little fatter, in my case I am 140 pounds, a couple of pounds fatter from my normal 134-136 pounds... I started my new years a little different... well firstly my parents were not with us because they were still in Zimbabwe... So I spent new years with Ibu and Gwanti... the Chidhuku's were asleep... secondly instead of having lots of fireworks and going a lil coo coo, we set off 3 fire crackers that we were given by Mr. Chidhuku and they lasted like 15 seconds in total and then we went back in the house.

Listening to Chingy Feat. J/Weav "One call away"


I then went to the computer and watched my favorite episode of the year of all shows i watched this year, and it was Medium Season 3 Episode 12: The one behind the wheel.

I loved that episode... it thought it was soooooo sweet... everyone else was partying around the world and I feel like i had fun and enjoyed how i progressed myself into the new year, no alcohol, no stupid behavior, just a relaxed environment... and i didnt wish i was somewhere else... i went to sleep at 2am and woke up at 9 am and woke little brother up, something i never do because he is always up before me...

I dont know what this year will hold for me or for anyone else but I know it will be the beginning of the next chapter of my life and I plan to make that chapter positive.

To all those all over the world, happy new years and be kind to each other.

I hold my cup of tea to make a cheers to all those who couldnt be with us for this new years.

**UNCLE J and GOGO I MISS U**

Listening to Chocolate Genius "Julia"

Listening to: Spice Girls "Headlines (Friendship lasts forever)"

There is 4.5 hours till new years...till 2008 and i have realized despite thinking alot about life while at the holiday inn, I realized i havent even thought about my new years resolution yet so im going to do the thinking right here, right now...

Listening to: Lionel Richie and Enrique Iglesias "To love a woman"

1. LOVE INTERESTS


Okay first of all, I want to do some work in the relationship section... i need to look for a sweet guy who is all about simplicity... and who is fun and romantic... i know love isnt always easy but no matter how tough things get, you feel like running into that persons arms and tell them that you are sorry and they say the same too and you move on and not begrudge each other... I dont know i guess I need a little bit of luck in the love section... I guess i shouldnt be too disappointed because I have only had one official boyfriend and even though it didnt work out, i am glad it happened because i learned ALOT about myself... I learnt that I can be vulnerable and can get hurt.

Listening to: Carlos Varela "Una Palabra"

I realized that i need to let my guard down like I did with my first boyfriend because you only learn from your weaknesses and how to progress... i wont say i will let my guard down in two seconds because no one ever wants to get hurt and i am always also scared of hurting the other person as well... but what is meant to be will be and what isnt meant to be wont be...

Listening to: Lumidee and Tony Sunshine "She's like the wind"

I think it is about time i find someone like me who doesn't like to argue and who just likes to hang out alone and with friends as well and who makes me feel special and who only notices me in a room filled with other girls and ofcourse a guy who doesnt cheat....

its pretty much like my ex except me and my ex argued alot and i need a positive relationship now... someone who i miss when they are gone and whom when im with them i kiss them to make sure it is not a dream...

Basically next year im going to work out what and who I am looking for and what i want in a relationship


2. FRIENDSHIPS

Well I want to keep making new friends but not abandon the old... I am pretty with my friends right now so there is not much I want to change but I want to make more of an effort to chill with Christie coz she will always be my white Zimbabwean sister ...hehehe...

3. University

Well I want to focus a little more on my course next semester because it is my last semester before i graduate and I just need to stay a little bit more focused and not choose parties over school work...

4. Health

I am planning to pay for gym membership and exercise as much as possible, eat healthier, drink less booze and walk more. And ofcourse eat less junkfood.

5. Family

Be even more closer to my family

6. Happiness

Be happy with my life

7. Future plans

I plan to work at kmart and save up and then when i graduate i plan to move to Sydney, start film school and apply for Permanent residency and get a job related to journalism while attending Film school...

8. Basically

Basically i want to have a productive year next year and reach next years new years and look back at the year with a smile

Listening to Selena "Dreaming of you"

just got back from Zimbabwe and while there i did alot of thinking... well first of all Cho Cho wrote me and told me about how he feels he is doing better... i feel happy for him... but i have to see it to believe it... he probably is doing good but i dont know if he stopped doing 'naughtiness'...

I dont know we have been through a lot... a little too much and i dont know if I can go back there again... at least not at this time... who knows what the future holds...

Then i started to think about how I had the perfect 'date' with a guy I wasnt even going out with,who has a girlfriend... I use the word date because i believe what we did that day is what i consider a perfect date... we were actually just chilling as friends but if i were to get a boyfriend and we did what we did that day i would have considered it the perfect date... well first I got picked up at my hotel and then we went to Canoeing at the Sydney Harbour... and then we Canoed to a little private beach and chilled in the crystal clear water and just talked and then he drove me to get fish and chips from his favorite fish and chips shop... it was gourmet... and then we walked to bondi beach and sat and watched the waves, talked and threw fish at the birds and had a laugh... and then we went and got ice cream and talked while walking back to the car... we had a great laugh... especially about how i had refused to open the bin while throwing our fish and chips rubbish because chances are I would forget and then put a finger filled with nasty bin bacteria in my mouth and he said whatever and opened the bin... and then when we were eating, ice cream dripped on his fingers and went on his hands and he licked them and then he realized that i was right and we both laughed... the bubble gum ice cream was pretty yummy... anyways he then dropped me at my hotel and I said good bye... anyways the point is that of all dates I have gone on, that was one of the best... and it wasnt even a date... hahaha... It was just so laid back, the conversation was good and we just chilled and relaxed, no rush, no cell phones, no stress, all in good fun.

Why are all the good men taken? hahaha...

And then i had a bit of a spat with my mother... she was nagging at me and saying that i should be thinking of journalism stuff during my holidays and blah blah blah... i dont know i think she was just having PMS and was snappy... i am a very energetic person coz i got ADD and she was criticizing me and telling me that when there are guests i should calm down and sit down and be like a zombie and thats not me... i am filled with life and energy and i felt like she was attacking whom i was...

Then the wedding was a disaster...we arrived when the wedding was over and people were getting ready to leave and were packing up... woops... kinda embarrasing but i dont really care because the family members are rude towards my dad and mom and dont understand why we have to be extremely happy with them when we are around them...

I am glad my dad was contemplating not going to the wedding because he is fed up of trying with his brothers and sisters and their kids but my mom wouldnt hear it... i think its good my dad doesnt care anymore because he has done his best and they are jealous of him and there is nothing we can do about that... how can you be jealous of your own brother?

Only 1.5 months left till i have University again and then soon after i am graduating... i have sooooo much to thing about!

End Song: Omarion "Ice Box"

Yesterday was one of the most scariest moments in my life. Just before 6pm on December 16th 2007 i went on a stretching walk after jogging on a route that has not many people walking buy and two men came at me one with a knife shouting vulgar words in portuguese that sounded like the word "bitch" in Russian ...SUKA... anyways i screamed and quickly grabbed my phone and gave it to them at knife point and ran away... and then when i was at a safe distance i told them i would call the police. It all happened so fast... all i could think about was not getting stabbed and getting away as fast as i could. When i first started walking to the path way, a guard did a weird whistle to someone who was sitting in the park... dont know if that is a coincidence. I then saw the man who was about to attack me walking in the direction that I was going to run. I did my run and then jogged back and passed the man with the white shirt. A couple of seconds later the man with an accomplice grabbed me and I got a cut on my wrist. I was so angry and that anger turned into fear. I am scared of going jogging now. Let alone going outside. I have been having small panic attacks and have been snappy... I hear about this shit but you never think that it is going to happen to you... the whole incident is also making me scared of moving to Sydney. I really wanted to help the people who are on that path with clothing and food but now all i feel is fear and hate for the Mozambiqueans... I know I shouldnt hate everyone for one persons action but i fear every man out there who passes me...I am really trying not to let the incident ruin my vacation. I know once i leave this country i will get over it eventually and move on.

How can any human being intentionally harm another human being? Some people are so evil.

my first posting is going to be a short one...

everything in my life at the moment is great... im back home with the family and enjoying their presence. Everything is like old times, Ibu playing video games, Gwanti being annoying as usual... Parents busy with work but making time to talk with us about things... it is good being home and taking a 3 month break from University.

Song of the moment: Justin Timberlakes "Losing my way"